


I'll Love You Anyway

by peterickswhore



Series: Peterick One Shots [30]
Category: Fall Out Boy
Genre: Angst, Asexual Character, Asexual Pete, Asexuality, Confused Patrick, Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Kissing, M/M, Patrick really doesn't understand asexuality, Patrick tries his best though, Underage - Freeform, Underage Patrick, older pete
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-23
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-11-04 13:40:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17899142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peterickswhore/pseuds/peterickswhore
Summary: After a year of dating Patrick's 17 and wants to finally sleep with Pete but Pete forgot to mention one big issue to him





	I'll Love You Anyway

**Patrick's POV**

Finally after almost a year of dating Pete is stretched out on my bed in only boxers. I'm also in boxers and with the way Pete's looking at me I doubt they'll stay on for much longer.

We've been dating a while and Pete's a year older than me so he waited until I turned 17 so we could legally do this. It's been a long time so I really want to loose my virginity to Pete, I love him a lot and I want to be intimate like that. He's never complained and he's never asked for more than I can give and I love him for that, he's so perfect.

Pete pulls me on top of him and we make out while Pete slips his tongue into mouth. We keep making out until I'm painfully hard and take my hands down to his boxers and tug on them. Instead of raising his hips so I can get them off Pete gently pulls my hand away and kisses me until I forget what I was doing.

Pete's an amazing kisser so we lie on my bed making out for a long time like we've done so many times. This time he actually let me take his pants off though so I really want to go all the way, I wish he wouldn't stop me.

The second time I pull at his boxers Pete does the same thing and rolls us over so he's on top of me. I let him kiss me for a while then try for the third time to get Pete naked.

This time he doesn't even try to be sexy about it, he tugs my wrist away and pins it to the bed to stop me touching him. It's so aggravating because Pete can be an asshole sometimes and he likes to see me squirm but this is just mean.

"Pete baby come on, I wanna get naked with you" "Don't rush things Trick" "But I need you, I'm 17 and we can finally do this, please give me this"

I thought my begging would work but he still shakes his head. He tries to kiss me again but I turn my head to the side so he only gets my cheek. I know I shouldn't be upset but Pete's promised me this so many times so I don't get why he's stopping me.

"Pete please, what's the problem? I want this, I want to give you my virginity" "Patrick..." "What's the problem? You've done this before so why won't you do it with me? I love you so don't I deserve to make love with you?" "I'm sorry" "Why Pete? What have I done wrong?"

I'm tearing up because I'm so convinced Pete doesn't love me anymore and he's going to dump me. When he rolls off me I sob and turn away from him so I don't have to look at him anymore.

He tries to curl himself around my back but I stick my elbow out so he can't touch me. I'm so mad and I just want to know what I did wrong, I thought I was good for Pete, I thought he'd make love with me.

"Baby I'm sorry" "You promised me that we could make love when I was 17, I'm old enough now and I know I want this" "Patrick I..." "Stop it, if you don't love me just tell me, if you don't want me I'll leave and you can find someone better" "There's no one better than you" "You won't even make love with me, obviously there's someone else" "I'm not cheating, I promised I'd never do that" "Then what's the problem? What have I done to make you hate me?" "I don't hate you"

I can feel him blushing and squirming and I kind of enjoy it, I know I shouldn't but it's nice to know he's upset too. "Patrick baby, I lied to you" "I thought so, what about?" "I haven't done this before" "With a guy?" "With anyone, I'm a virgin, I'm sorry baby"

I wait for him to tell me it's a joke but he's totally silent so I roll over. Pete's eyes are closed but there's tear stains on his cheeks so I guess he is telling the truth, I feel kind of bad now.

"Pete baby it's ok, I don't care if you're a virgin, you should have told me" "I'm sorry" "It's ok, this is even better, we can loose our virginity to each other, I'd love that Petey"

I thought that would make him happy but Pete shakes his head and covers his face so I don't know what to do. He's told me he'd slept with people before so I don't know why he lied, it doesn't make sense. He's always known that I'm a virgin so I wouldn't say anything about him being one too. I like it even more because this will be special for both of us.

"Petey don't cry this is a good thing" "Patrick stop, I can't do this" "It's ok, we can do this together, we can make love and give ourselves up to each other, that's beautiful"

He pulls me closer so I get excited but Pete buries his head in my chest and I can feel him shaking under my touch. I wish I knew what to do but I don't so all I can do is hold him and hope he'll tell me what's wrong.

"Patrick, I lied about something else" "What is it? Is Pete not your real name? Are you a murderer or a con man on the run?" "No, I wish I was" "What is it? I love you and you can tell me anything" "I'm asexual" "What?" "I'm asexual" "But you love me" "I do, I love you more than anything" "But..." "Asexual just means I don't want sex"

I pull back to see if he's serious but he refuses to look at me so I don't know what to do. I don't even know what asexual means so I don't know if I should be here or not. Maybe I'm such a bad kisser and look so ugly naked that it's made him hate sex. Maybe it's just with me because I'm so ugly and lame that he can't stand the idea of sex with me.

"Patrick I'm so sorry" "I love you, am I that horrible? I just want to make love to you" "I'm sorry" "Apologising isn't helping, help me understand" "I don't like sex, I don't want to have sex with anyone, it's not about you" "But I thought you loved me, you promised once I was old enough we could have sex" "I lied, I love you so I thought if I told you I didn't want sex you'd leave me. I said once you were old enough we could do it because I knew it'd be a year so I could ignore the problem for a while. I hoped that if we dated for that long you'd love me so when I told you I didn't want sex you'd stay with me,"

I still don't understand but I feel bad for upsetting Pete so much. He's done everything for me and I love him so much so even if I don't understand I'll try to help him. Maybe if I show him how much I love him he'll realise he does like my body and he'll want to sleep with me. I just want to make love with my boyfriend.

"Patrick maybe you should go" "What? You're kicking me out?" "No I just think you should leave, you came for sex and I can't put out so you should go" "I love you, I'm sorry I don't understand, I'm trying" "I know it's hard for you, I'm sorry" "Why didn't you tell me?" "Because you were a beautiful drunk 16 year old trying to get laid in a bar. I took you home and took care of you but I thought if you knew I didn't want sex you wouldn't give me a chance.  I was in love with you from the first minute I saw you and I wanted you to love me back. I thought you couldn't love me without the sex and I guess I was right"

Getting kicked out of my boyfriends house feels shit so I'm crying as I stumble around the room, pulling my clothes on. When I try to open the door it's locked so I fumble trying to unlock it but I can't do it so I sob and sink to my knees.

After a while Pete comes and carries me back to his bed so I lie there crying and let him cuddle up to me. "Patrick I'm sorry, I messed everything up" "No you didn't, I'm not good enough for you and I get it, I'm sorry" "I love you Patrick and you're the most amazing, beautiful person I've ever met, don't doubt that" "Then why won't you have sex with me?" "Patrick I will, I won't get turned on by it but if you want sex we can have sex. I don't want to loose you so if that's what you need we can do it" "You'd be disgusted by having sex with me?" "No but it wouldn't turn me on, it's not something I've ever wanted"

It's so nice that Pete's offering to have sex with me but I feel bad that he's having to compromise on this. He's always respected what I want and even now with something as important as sex he's willing to make me happy. Pete's willing to do something he's not comfortable with to make me happy and I don't know how I got such a perfect boyfriend.

"I love you Pete, if you don't want sex we won't have sex" "Baby, I don't want to hold you back" "No, you always respect me and my stupid ideas and morals, you shouldn't have to compromise on this" "You shouldn't either" "I can still jerk off, I loved you for a year without sex so I can keep loving you" "I will do it to make you happy" "No it's ok, we can talk about it in the future but for now it's ok. Do you not like the idea of handjobs and blowjobs as well?" "I don't mind handjobs and I could try blowjobs, I'll do anything to make you happy" "Thank you" "The idea of sex doesn't fully gross me out, it's weird but I'd be ok with it for you, I'd be ok with doing anything for you"

Slowly he pulls off my shirt and jeans again and we curl up, holding each other close. It'll be hard because I do want to have sex with him but we'll work on it, if I need it he's willing but I don't want him to have to do it. I love him for who he is so if he can't have sex that's ok, I'm sure we can find other fun things to do. If I'm desperate I can always buy myself sex toys to play with when Pete's not home, I've got backup plans in case I get needy.

I'd never want to cheat on Pete because I know how horrible it is that the person you love is betraying you. My dad cheated on my mom and she was so upset so I'd never do it to Pete. It's not his fault sex doesn't turn him on so I would never hurt him because of it. He's put up with my quirks and faults, and no matter how much of me I show him he loves it all so that makes me feel amazing. I'll really work to make sure he knows I love him regardless of whether or not we have sex, he deserves for me to respect this. If he's willing to share something this special with me I'll respect it and show him I love him even more now.


End file.
